Posts by Seeking Knowledge

20

Another name for Christmas???

by ohiocowboy in

jw
friends

i absolutely love this time of year, and the warm feelings, and the general feeling of good will emitting from people, but, not really having a faith in christ or religion, i somehow find it difficult to use the word christmas, as it denotes a celebration of christ... .

for those of us who enjoy this season, but aren't really firm believers, can any of us think of a name that could be used instead of the word "christmas", that would have special meaning for believers and non-believers alike, a word that evokes the same emotional feelings?

i have spent the past week decking the halls, and setting up the "christmas" tree(s), getting ready for this holiday which i enjoy so much, but it is that one word "christmas" that somehow makes me feel as though i am contradicting myself, because i no longer have a faith in that higher power.

Seeking Knowledge

Season of Joy? I like that!

14

Hypocrasy?? Could it be?

by Seeking Knowledge in

hi all, i hope i'm posting this in the right subject area:

had a "discussion" with my ex the other day, in which i asked him to stop telling our son that birthdays/pumpkins/santa and whatever else were "bad" as he was more or less telling our son that my beliefs are wrong.

of course he says he's only teaching him "truth from the bible" i asked him to point out to me where in the blble it says you can't celebrate these things, he couldn't.

Seeking Knowledge

Once again Frannie, good advice thank you. I am in the process of getting our son into counseling. I've already prepared for the inevitable with my attorney and I'm taking her prescribed course. I have gathered so much information to point out to anyone who is not JW "smart" as to why this needs to be done.

Gill, appreciate your honesty, I know he's a liar and he's going to do whatever it takes to "throw me off the scent", the good thing is, I no longer believe anything that comes out of his mouth!

Atlas....THANK YOU....I will keep that in mind, I love to watch his head explode! The more I know the less he can use!

SK

14

Hypocrasy?? Could it be?

by Seeking Knowledge in

hi all, i hope i'm posting this in the right subject area:

had a "discussion" with my ex the other day, in which i asked him to stop telling our son that birthdays/pumpkins/santa and whatever else were "bad" as he was more or less telling our son that my beliefs are wrong.

of course he says he's only teaching him "truth from the bible" i asked him to point out to me where in the blble it says you can't celebrate these things, he couldn't.

Seeking Knowledge

Hi All, I hope I'm posting this in the right subject area:

Had a "discussion" with my ex the other day, in which I asked him to stop telling our son that birthdays/pumpkins/santa and whatever else were "bad" as he was more or less telling our son that my beliefs are wrong. He's JW and I'm not. Of course he says he's only teaching him "truth from the bible" I asked him to point out to me where in the blble it says you can't celebrate these things, he couldn't.

But he came up with some interesting comments, thought I'd throw them out there for an opinion so I can go back & ask him about them. Before I start, this is a man who was out of the cult for awhile (hence our son) and decided the pressure was too much, got back in and immediately got married & is now expecting another child. Together the 2 of them are trying to put on the "perfect family" show and teaching my son there is no other way than theirs. Needless to say, I'm not happy about this.

First off...I reminded him that before our son was born we discussed why he wouldn't be raised a JW and that we would expose him to both our religions (this is before I knew anything about it)....I told him that I didn't want him ramming the JW down his throat so that he would feel that was the only way he could be....his response?

"I wouldn't do that, if he decides to be a Catholic, that's ok with me"

Second...I asked him how he could try to raise our son as JW when I wasn't of that "faith" as that would require our son to believe that we (me and his sister and our side of the family) would be "murdered by God" and we were basically to be ignored, etc as we were not of "the truth" and should be treated as such. He shook his head & got a little offronted & said "Oh no, I would never do that, it's his decision" He said the same thing about having him baptised, said he would never do that, in fact looked like he'd just sucked on a whole lemon when I mentioned it.

Those are things that stick out the most that I remember of our conversatoin. Everything I've read on the JW religion leads me to believe he is full of it. ( Heck, everything he says anymore leads me to believe that, but that's not the issue right now.) Am I wrong to think that he's full of it??

I was able to throw my limited understanding of the JW ways back at him regarding these 2 specific items, and I must say, he was shocked, he certainly wasn't prepared for it (felt kinda nice to see the reaction! ) but I need some possible guidance for any future interraction with him.

Thanks!

SK

26

"Bless You!"

by kaykay_mp in

jw
friends

...is something any decent person would say if you sneezed.

but i was thinking, "surely some of the dubs would see something wrong with saying this.

" if you were at the hall, one of them would probably would cut in and say something asenine like, "you're not blessing him, jehovah and his holy spirit is...".

Seeking Knowledge

I tell my son to say "God bless you" when people sneeze, and he immediately starts into his prayers when he hears "God bless" too funny. I didn't realize that was a no-no with the JW's...guess I'll make sure he continues!

57

Hello all you Newbies!!!!!

by kls in

jw
friends

i see we are having a run on newbies and just wanted to say and welcome to you all.

.

i don't know all your screen names and don't want to miss any so post and say hi.

Seeking Knowledge

Hi Everyone.....since we're all saying HI thought I'd stop in as well. I don't post much, mostly read for all the knowledge I can find here to help me out in my day to day dealings with "my" JW. I'm not a JW, but I deal with one every day! Thanks for sharing all your stories!

SK

8

Need advice!

by Seeking Knowledge in

jw
friends

howdy everyone, i must start by saying "thank you"for posting all this information on the jw way of life in here, i appreciate everything that you guys are putting out there, both for your own use and to help others like me.

i've posted a couple times, but mostly i'm here to learn, but now it's time for me to ask questions!.

i am not a jw, i was involved with one for several years, and we have a son.

Seeking Knowledge

It really is sad that I have to think about counseling at this young age. But I will do whatever it takes to make sure he comes out ok. He's the innocent one, wish his dad would think about that instead of himself first. I know that's a joke tho. I will focus on my son, he deserves not to be tormented by an adult he trusts and who should know better. Pathetic really!

I'll do my best! Thanks for the advice, wish I didn't need it!

What does not kill us will only make us stronger right?

8

Need advice!

by Seeking Knowledge in

jw
friends

howdy everyone, i must start by saying "thank you"for posting all this information on the jw way of life in here, i appreciate everything that you guys are putting out there, both for your own use and to help others like me.

i've posted a couple times, but mostly i'm here to learn, but now it's time for me to ask questions!.

i am not a jw, i was involved with one for several years, and we have a son.

Seeking Knowledge

Hi Frannie!

The religion thing for one is what he's not abiding by, paying child support (altho the state is after him, but he's not paying in the meantime even tho the judge told him to) and little things like not having our son call his wife "mom" and things like that. He's always trying to fight whatever I talk to him about. It's exhausting. I've tried to let things go, but it's very hard! If I say "don't do this" he runs right out & does it. Such a child!

Thanks for the advise. I have discussed a psychologist with my attorney, we're headed for mediation next since he won't talk to me. Just trying to keep my boy sane until we get there!

8

Need advice!

by Seeking Knowledge in

jw
friends

howdy everyone, i must start by saying "thank you"for posting all this information on the jw way of life in here, i appreciate everything that you guys are putting out there, both for your own use and to help others like me.

i've posted a couple times, but mostly i'm here to learn, but now it's time for me to ask questions!.

i am not a jw, i was involved with one for several years, and we have a son.

Seeking Knowledge

Thanks for that!

We do have a custody order and yes, he's not abiding by most of it, my next recourse is court and that's where we are heading. I just need help in what to do with my kid in the meantime! I do not tell him that his dad's religion is wrong, but that he has different beliefs. It's very hard to take the high road!

He was born & raised a JW, his parents would never have anything to do with me, never met his friends, always kept at arms length when I asked questions. I chalked it up to his "way" but realize now what was really happening. I believe he was rebelling against the system if you will, and I was the perfect excuse. His parents wouldn't talk to him for a very long time, but once they did, they obviously got him back. Not the person I thought he was, and well, live & learn..only now we have a son so I'm a little more open eye'd to everything, where he is a self centered child determined to win no matter the cost!

8

Need advice!

by Seeking Knowledge in

jw
friends

howdy everyone, i must start by saying "thank you"for posting all this information on the jw way of life in here, i appreciate everything that you guys are putting out there, both for your own use and to help others like me.

i've posted a couple times, but mostly i'm here to learn, but now it's time for me to ask questions!.

i am not a jw, i was involved with one for several years, and we have a son.

Seeking Knowledge

Howdy everyone, I must start by saying "thank you"for posting all this information on the JW way of life in here, I appreciate everything that you guys are putting out there, both for your own use and to help others like me. I've posted a couple times, but mostly I'm here to learn, but now it's time for me to ask questions!

I am not a JW, I was involved with one for several years, and we have a son. Never married, (and I have to say thank God for that). It was not until our relationship was over and he was married (within 6 months) that I learned what an idiot I was for so long. Ok, maybe that's harsh, but I didn't realize what I was in for until after my heart was broken. Cheesy yes, but true. He was not "practicing" while with me, at least not that I was aware of at the time, and it wasn't until after our son was born that his guilt kicked in big time and he went & got himself a nice JW wife, and pleased his parents, and whatever group of people he sits with several times a week. I don't begrudge him his beliefs, but now he's really shown me what it's all about. Should have paid attention to the signs before huh??

We have shared custody of our son, when I get him home after visiting with his dad, he tells me that dad says he can't pray, that birthdays are bad, etc. Ok, I can handle this to a point, and but I'm wondering if any of you out there have had similar problems? And what did you do? My son is only 3..its not like he's old enuff to make these decisions for himself (yet) and before the crazy JW came back out of my ex, we talked about exposing our son to both religions (I'm protestant) and letting him come up with his own decision when he's old enuff. Naive yes, I realize that now! I know he won't do this, and there is a court battle, again in my future. I do not plan to allow my son to be exposed anymore than he is now, but I need some advise on how to approach his father (who rarely speaks to me and won't do it without the new wifey present) on the subject, let him know I won't allow it. I should include the fact that I've tried, so many times since we broke up, to talk to him about things that are important, he shrugs me off and does what he wants anyway. We've been to court, he's been ordered to do certain things (and not do certain things) and he still does what he wants. I know talking to him and trying to reason are wasting my time, but my attorney says that's the route I have to take for now. In the meantime all I can do is express to my son that his dad has different beliefs and that it's ok to pray, etc. I just don't want my son to be a stark raving lunatic before I can rectify the situation. I should mention that for 3 weeks now I've asked for time with him (the idiot) to discuss this, and he keeps putting me off. Says he won't talk to me without his wife present, and that's not a good idea, she tends to answer for him, and that makes me crazy!

Any suggestions?? He's pretty smart, but his dad diciplines with fear you know and so knowing what I know now reading all these posts he's already afraid of making his dad mad.

thanks for listening!

30

Hello

by WinterFalcon in

this is my first post here and i guess because it's going to be a doozy i felt i should introduce myself first.

i am a non jw, 40 yrs old, divorced/remarried/widowed mother of 3 children the oldest two who are out of the house (in college).

i have just recently joined after lurking for a while.

Seeking Knowledge

WinterFalcon:

Like you I am "lurking" for answers. My advise to you is RUN do not walk to your nearest exit. I was reading your initial post and it almost mirrors my experience with my JW. Only I did let it get too far and ignored the signs & lies and we now have a son. He's remarried and back in the flock and I'm dealing with the fallout with the kid & his father telling him my beliefs are wrong. Anyway, he's lying to you, I agree with the other posts, he's leading a double life and believe me, he'll go back and you'll be dropped like a hot stone. It's not worth it, I can attest to that...tell him nicely to piss off and delete him from your list. No good will come of this, and you cannot be a friend to someone who will not ask for it, but will take as much as he can get. Besides, you are much better than this...you deserve much much better than he will ever offer you.

Good Luck!!